Superwoman

NORTHERN REFLECTIONS April 2001

By Judith Bagshaw

It's been a while since I last wrote a column for Superwoman, and I've missed it. But a run of poor health has kept me focused on regaining that health and getting my energies back to a place where I have the desire and the gumption to do something other than sleep.

Very briefly and because I'm sure no one is overly interested in my health history, my thyroid decided to stop functioning the spring of '99 and my iron count managed to find it's way into the basement. I had no energy, no spark and had ignored many of the symptoms along the way. My life was so busy. I was running a special reading program at work and packing up a classroom for the completion of construction on the school that summer. Who had time to make doctor's appointments? Besides, I put my fatigue down to stress and the noise and stench from construction already underway. It was only when I'd had two weeks of rest at the cottage and was still not feeling better, that alarm bells went off, and I finally got to the doctor. You'd think, as much of a healthy living advocate as I am, that I would have had more sense! But it just goes to show how easy it is to delude ourselves.

For most of the '99-'00 school year, I worked half time. I'm lucky to work for a school board that is supportive and understanding. And I have a principal who is even more so. I had no problems, and am even now working with restricted duties. I can't say that I miss yard duty, especially on our cold Canadian winter days!

Over that year of part time, I regained much of my normal energy and on days off used part of my time to write and to become more familiar with my computer and the Internet. I discovered to my great interest, a thriving publishing industry developing there. The more I researched this new industry, the more excited I became and an idea started to grow in my mind.

I have, for years, wanted to write and publish stories with large sized characters. I took courses and workshops to hone my writing skills and joined a local writer's organization for support and guidance. But when I expressed my desire to write these kinds of stories, I was always told politely that they wouldn't sell. Publisher's wouldn't be interested. There wouldn't be a market. I knew in my heart that there was a market. And even if it was a small one (and I didn't necessarily believe this), I felt strongly there was a need for these kinds of stories to be written.

I was thrilled one day to find reference in a writer's magazine to a small independent publisher specializing in romance stories with large size heroines. And they were accepting manuscripts. Here was my chance. I spent the summer of that year, writing my first romance novel, Teacher's Pet. That fall I was able to send it to the publisher. Months went by and I finally had word back, along with the manuscript with edits to be done and a request to resubmit. I did the work and dutifully sent it off, heart pounding. And then many months went by with no word or reply to emails. I then found out that the publisher had had some problems and things were delayed but it looked like there was still hope. So I clung on. At the end of two years, I gave up on this particular publisher ever following through, and was thankful I'd never signed a contract.

So the manuscript sat gathering dust. I wrote another novel, Love by the Pound, basically to see if I could. And I started a third. And there were several short stories. All have large sized heroines. But I despaired of them ever finding a home. And then I discovered electronic publishers. I saw an industry that was young and full of energy. I saw that many of the publishers were women. I saw an open minded attitude, seeking alternative views and a desire to stretch the boundaries. I saw opportunity.

My serious research began there. I searched out every royalty paying online publisher I could and learned everything I could about them all, until I narrowed my focus down to three or four that I felt would be the best 'fit' for me. One stood out for one simple reason. She was actively seeking romance stories that featured non-traditional heroines, including plus size. And she was taking submissions for a short story anthology of holiday related stories.

I set a goal for the summer holidays, of writing and/or submitting one new story or novel chapter per week. And I kept to that schedule. I wrote a short called Saint Nic, a Christmas story about a large sized baker named Nicole who meets the new doctor in town, only to get embroiled in a huge misunderstanding that almost costs her a relationship. I submitted it to Wordbeams (www.wordbeams.com), the publisher I had chosen, and the first week of August, I signed my first contract.

You can imagine how stunned, excited, overwhelmed and jubilant I felt. It made me work harder. When my friend Lisa, from Tennessee, came to visit in early August and lamented that no one ever wrote romances that featured short women, especially short fat women, I sat down and wrote Belle's Jingle, about a short fat woman who wins a jingle writing contest and the heart of the advertising executive from the sponsoring company. I submitted it for the same anthology and within a few weeks signed a contract for it as well.

At this point, I didn't think I could be any happier. My health was back on track. I started back teaching full time in the fall. And one day, I blew the dust off the two books I had written and sent them off to my publisher. In November I signed contracts for them both. They're both slated for release later this year. December '00 brought the release of that first anthology, Merry Musings, a wonderful Christmas present for me to share with my family and friends. I submitted a short story for a new anthology. My story, Chance Encounter, was accepted and was released Valentine's Day '01 in the anthology from Wordbeams, called Lovey-Dovey. I've signed contracts for three more short stories that will appear in future anthologies, one being a Plus Size Romance Anthology! My publisher really loves these kinds of stories!

I've set up my own web site (http://writerlady.homestead.com/homepage.html) and work on promoting my books. Reviews have come in now and people are responding so favorably to my plus size heroines. I want to write to all those nay-sayers that said these kinds of stories would never sell, and tell them they were wrong, wrong, wrong!!

I look forward now to building my writing career as my teaching career winds down, and know that I will be writing about these wonderful large sized women and men until I run out of ideas!!

I look at e-publishing and e-books as the wave of the future. It's a growing industry that offers an alternative to the traditional print world. And it's given a voice and a venue for stories that we, in the fat community, have wanted to read; stories about people just like us.

NORTHERN REFLECTIONS Winter 2001

By Judith Bagshaw

I believe there is an old saying that goes something like 'the only constant in life is change'. It certainly seems to hold true in my life and unfortunately, I'm one of those people for whom change is a difficult and stressful thing. For example, I've lived in the same place for almost 20 years. I've worked in the same school for 22 years. I wear favorite clothes and shoes until long past when I should replace them. My car is more rust than car, but I keep fixing it and driving it because I'm comfortable in it. I must know in detail what to expect when presented with a new outing or a place I've never been to before. I don't like people to just 'drop by' my home, even family or close friends. I'm the least spontaneous person I know. Sad but true.

Some of this neuroticism stems I'm sure, from the many early embarrassing situations I found myself in when I was a bit more adventurousthere was not seating to fit me; I couldn't get through the turnstile; parking was miles away; too many stairs, not enough breath; the bathroom stall was too small; no hospital gown to cover me; only booths or attached seats in restaurants; and many other such situations. Frankly, in the face of lack of information or uncertainty, it was just easier to stay home.

But of course, the fates wouldn't just let me quietly sit back and relax. No, they had to keep jumping in there and throwing things in my path. You know, that really ticks me off, but what's a girl to do? So, at the mid-point in my life, I've had to learn how to be more open to spontaneity. And it's really hard.

In my last column I talked about my past two years, having to face a minor health crisis. The fates had a ball during this time. I've had to go to so many specialists and have a raft of testsall new and unfamiliar, each visit fraught with those questions: will I fit? What's the test consist of? Do I have to remove my clothes? How do I cover myself then? Can the equipment handle me? But I managed to weather these difficulties and have survived them all.

A major life change is coming within the next five years as I retire from teaching. So, to prepare, as you all now know, I've been building a writing career and paving the way gently into the next phase of my life. I had it worked out so that when I handed in those final retirement papers, I would have an easy segue into my next career. No muss, no fuss! Ha! The fates are up to their old mischief again. My publisher has just told her authors that she is closing the company due to major health problems. As of December 31, 2001, Wordbeams will be no more.

I am faced with the task of trying to find another publisher who will make me feel as secure and supported and cared about as Susan did at Wordbeams; a daunting task for sure. Wordbeams and her publisher/owner, have managed in a short period of time to become one of the most respected and closely watched businesses in the epublishing world. She is leaving at the top of her game, which in many ways, is a nice way to go. Wordbeams will be long remembered as a class act. But I am heartbroken that she will not be there to see the fruition of what she helped start by sending me that first contract.

I wish Susan only the best in her recovery from illness and hope that these changes bring for her a whole new beginning. And I will be doing my damned-est to fulfill the promise that Susan saw in me as a writer.

And I will, I'm sure, weather this storm and find another home for my stories.

And I hope, for a while anyway, that this is the last big change I have to deal with! I'll keep you posted. -Judy

Northern Reflections: Spring 2002

By Judith Bagshaw

I just wanted to update everyone a bit on my ongoing publishing dilemma. As I told you in my last column, my dear publisher Susan, closed Wordbeams on Dec.31/01. It was awful to see the final day arrive but I to other publishers. I decided to be smart this time and not put all my eggs in one basket, so I've submitted to three. I have had some really positive feedback and definite interest, but no firm commitments yet from any of them. Keep your fingers crossed for me.

In the meantime, if anyone who gets this newsletter is interested in purchasing either of my novels (Love by the Pound, Teacher's Pet), you can email me directly for information at writestuff0@yahoo.com. If you visit my website you can find excerpts and reviews of both books http://writerlady.homestead.com/homepage.html. I also have a third novel coming soon (I hope) called Lady Blue.

I am finding that online there is a growing interest in books, stories and magazines for and about large sized people. It seems that where the print world turns a blind eye, the electronic world is opening their arms. Two new publishers that I've found actively seeking and publishing large sized stories are Real Romances (note their new Internet address)(http://realromances.tripod.com), and Novel Books, Inc. (www.novelbooksinc.com)

You might also want to check out a nifty little site called Dangerous Curves (http://curvynovels.tripod.com ) The webmistress is building a one stop shop kind of place where you'll find a huge listing of books featuring size related material (note: not all plus size, so look carefully) plus reviews, great links etc. She has reviewed both my novels. It's worth a look. As well, you might want to look at Abundance Magazine (www.abundancemagazine.com ). As I find other places that are interesting, I'll pass them along. If you know of some good online places to visit, let me know and I'll check them out and pass them along also. (send to: writestuff0@yahoo.com )

The theme of this issue of Superwoman is on weight loss surgery, a topic guaranteed to raise my blood pressure. I have never considered it, even for a moment, so don't feel I have much to offer on the topic from personal experience. However, I do have a related story to pass on. It punctuates in my mind all that is the worst in the medical community.

Several years ago, I experienced some alarming changes in my cycle that not only had me in pain, but had me frightened that they were symptoms of a greater horrorcancer. I was afraid to approach my doctor; afraid that she would confirm my fears and I just didn't want to go there.

But common sense took over finally and I went to my GP. She, of course, sent me to a gynecologist. I'd never been to one and was horrified at the thought. My own doctor had always done my examinations in that department. I was comfortable with her. I couldn't imagine a complete stranger, a man at that, performing such an intimate exam.

I worked up what little courage I had and went to my appointment. My first indication of what was to come, should have been his waiting room. There were no seats for fat people. I stood, embarrassed, waiting for my appointed time. The doctor finally appeared to get me and I can only describe his initial reaction as startled and repulsed. Both emotions were totally readable in his body language and facial reactions. He even took a step back. I felt my insides sink to the floor. I was completely devastated and didn't know how to escape.

It just went downhill from there. I disrobed for my exam and got on the table. He came in and the first problem we encountered was the fact that the table was flush against a wall, so I could not arrange my body to allow him to examine me. I got a verbal scolding, in effect, for making his job difficult. At this point I was in tears. As he poked, prodded and expressed his disgust (not in so many words but in tone and facial expression), I died a little and could not wait for this agony to be over. We ended the session with him asking me if I had ever considered weight loss surgery as a treatment for my obesity. I told him definitely not, with enough vigor that he was surprised and commented that he guessed I had heard some things about it. And then, thankfully, he was gone.

I don't remember much else about the visit; just that I got out of there as quickly as I could and refused to go back for any follow-up. And, I didn't have cancer and the problem was easily fixed.

I complained to my doctor about his treatment of me. If I'd been a more confident and assertive person at the time, I would have complained to the Medical Association. But I wasn't and a lot of time has gone by. But I've never allowed a doctor since to treat me with anything less than respect. In fact, I have to say that I've never since come anywhere close to finding this lack of compassion or tact anywhere else. Hopefully there aren't too many out there like him.

NORTHERN REFLECTIONS: Summer 2002

By Judith Bagshaw

For this column, I hope you will indulge me as I present something a little different from my usual stream of consciousness pieces. I don't consider myself any kind of poet, but the following just screamed to be written as such. I speak for any of us who have had that conversation which begins with, "My you have such a pretty faceif only"

All This...and a Pretty Face too.

By Judy Bagshaw

So you say I have a pretty faceif only

If only what!

If only I were thin?

If only I were normal?

If only my body matched my face?

Suppose your thinking is flawed.

Consider this.

I also have a warm and generous heart filled to the brim with love for life, for my family and friends, and despite your judgements,

love for myself.

I have a tolerant soul that looks beyond the outer shell and tries to see the true person beneath the surface,

Who understands that you are not really condemning me to the hopelessness and failure of not measuring up to arbitrary measures of normalcy

You care, but you are afraid.

I have a quick intelligence that makes me love to learn new things.

I am someone who is still surprised at the things that catch my interest

and stimulate my curiosity.

I am never bored, because there is always something to do.

It allows me to understand that bigotry isfear unchecked.

I have a keen intuition.

I understand, sometimes without words.

I just sometimes, know.

And with that is an innate empathy for people.

When I tell you I know how you feel, I do.

I have faith in othersnot naiveté, just acceptance.

I know how to listen, really listen not just to what is being said,

but also what is not.

A vivid imagination allows me to weave the sensual threads

of my life till now

into stories to entertain, provoke, surprise, teach.

In doing this, I learn about myself.

I have a great sense of humor and an ability to laugh at myself, and life's absurdities.

I take pleasure when I can make others laugh too,

Not at me, but with me.

I have goals and ambitions that keep me moving forward instead of looking back,

and hobbies and interests that bring diversity into my days.

I have a large soft presence that offers warm hugs when needed, and broad shoulders to bear another's burdens.

I am comfortable in my own skin.

So when you look at me again, really look.

Because you see, I have all these things in large measure.

Don't limit me to a narrow definition.

I have all these things

And yes, I have a pretty face too!

***

ANNOUNCING

THE RELEASE OF

Tales From the Heart

Three authors bring three great romances apiece to this new anthology from Real Romances, a Canadian e-publisher.

Nine tender, funny, touching, heart-warming stories of love.

AVAILABLE FOR PURCHASE AT http://realromances.tripod.ca

'Tales From The Heart' is an anthology of nine contemporary romantic short stories about Real Women finding Real Romance. The stories are outlined as follows:

Judy Bagshaw

Blue Collar Knight - Marcie needs rescuing in the worst way, but is Mike for real? Does that cocky grin and sexy swagger mean he really is flirting with her, or is it just wishful thinking on the part of a lonely gal who has almost -- but not quite -- given up on romance? {Note: This story features two supersized women!}

The Jackpot - Cathy Merrick never dreamed she'd win the lottery. But she will find out that all that money doesn't mean a thing compared to the joy of winning the most precious jackpot of all -- true love!

Wrong Number? - Dan Raeburn has a sexy voice that just melts Lori's heart and leaves her wanting to hear him whisper his flirtatious words forever. But it's easy to flirt when you're at the other end of a phone line! Is she willing to take a chance that the man is everything he seems to be, or should she let caution -- and the rules of her workplace -- steal a chance for love?

Rebecca Brock

The Buddy Thing - Rachel Sanders needs a fairy godmother if she is ever to get past her crush on Bryan, especially with an evil -- but beautiful -- cousin in the mix! But maybe this Cinderella doesn't need a magic wand to find that love can be sweet when Prince Charming is your best friend in the world!

Signs - Life isn't easy for a widowed mom of a child with special needs. It would take an extraordinary man to deal with her life, and Kate isn't looking. Her son Danny is enough to fill her days with love. But maybe fate has other plans in the works; life is about to teach her that love can surprise you when you least expect it.

Daydream Believer - Molly is not open to office romance, especially with the office Romeo, known to one and all as a love 'em and leave 'em kind of guy! But Jack has other ideas. Is he just out to conquer another heart, or will Molly find out that daydreams are just pale imitations of life?

Charlotte Bennett

Chameleon - World-weary, cynical Camelia has met one too many cheaters in her line of work as a private detective. Joe Landry is just another louse in a world infested with them. Too bad he is the first man in ages to make her heart beat just a little faster. Is he off-limits, or is there a way their budding passion can work?

Eye Of the Beholder - Valerie is tired of a world where women are viewed as desirable only if they're a size two and age eighteen. So when she reads yet another ad looking for bikini models, this full-figured woman decides that enough is enough; she is going on a one woman campaign to change the world. Is Rafe Holt, the organizer of the model search, the enemy, or is he the answer to a real-size woman's prayers?

Date With Destiny - Honey Madison wins the dream of a lifetime... a date with a hunky romance novel cover model. Expecting him to be accompanied by an entourage of publicity types, she is astounded to find herself all alone with heartthrob Heath Turner, and in his brawny arms

NORTHERN REFLECTIONS

Fall 2002

By Judy Bagshaw

Hi all. Once again I fell victim to the grueling schedule that befalls me at the end of the school year and I missed the deadline for the summer Superwoman, something I swore I would do my damnedest to prevent. I do apologize to Sherry, my friend and forgiving editor. I will keep trying to be more diligent Sherry, I promise.

I wanted to take part of this column to address that missed issue of Superwoman. I have to say that my first response to Sherry's editorial and then Nancy's article was to get my back up and feel resentful. This lasted about 5 seconds and then I felt really sheepish and ashamed. You see, I was one of those people that didn't return the survey. I even had most of it filled in except for the measuring, and my only excuse is that I allowed myself to get caught up in everything else and avoid what was going to be a tedious task for me to do. And it's easy for me to get sidetracked. I have a very time consuming career in teaching and a second career in writing that is becoming more and more time consuming. It's easy for me to say that I have to mark these tests, or I have a deadline for that short story or contest. And next thing I know weeks have passed and I've successfully forgotten that little job I had to get done. (I can do this for avoiding housework too)

And I'm ashamed of myself for neglecting something that has played such an important role in my life. In fact, I probably wouldn't have this writing career at all if not for the confidence and personal peace that NAAFA and the SuperSIG brought to me, and a desire instilled by them to bring some sense of this feeling to others.

I think Sherry has done a remarkable job with the SuperSIG and through some great personal adversities. She has truly cared about us and has given so much of herself. I don't want to see her quit, because I truly believe she is the leader we need.

So I very humbly beg forgiveness for being one of these many who found they were too busy to help their Supersized sisters, and I pledge to try harder to keep my priorities in order in the future.

I have been busy on the writing front. December saw the closure of Wordbeams, my wonderful publisher, as you know, and I had to begin the job of finding a new publisher for my plus sized stories. I sent out my two novels to a couple of Canadian

e-publishers and then submitted and sold three short stories to Real Romances, a Canadian e-publisher who specialized in books that feature 'real sized' heroines. I waited for months to hear from the other publishers and finally decided on a different course. I am pleased to say that Real Romances will be re-publishing Teacher's Pet and Love by the Pound. You can look for them a http://realromances.tripod.com in mid-August/ 02.

Now Real Romances is passionate about representing people of size in their romances. But they are having difficulty finding good writers and good stories. In fact, a while back, they questioned whether they would continue to keep the company going. Their readers persuaded them to do so. So here's my plea to any of you out there that are, maybe, closet writers. Consider strongly, submitting your novels to Real Romances. Their submission guidelines are posted on their site. They are WONDERFUL and supportive to work with. They welcome new writers. They are answering a need here. Help them grow by becoming part of the team.

Another site to look out for is Dangerously Curvy Novels (http://curvynovels.tripod.com) Jen, the web-mistress, reviews and has lists of books that feature plus sized heroines. She has a free newsletter you can subscribe to from her web-site where you can get these reviews sent directly to your mailbox. As well, she has started a yahoo list (http://groups.yahoo.com/groups/BBWRomancewriting/) If any of you BBW writers of BBW stories wants to, ask to join. This is a mixed group of abilities so there's no need to feel intimidated.

The topic of this issue of Superwoman is public accessibility, something all of us as Supersized people face on a daily basis. It could be turnstiles in the entrance of a store, or washrooms with tiny cubicles. Perhaps it's only armed chairs in the restaurant, or narrow seating in the theater. It can be inadequate seating available at the doctor's office, or uncomfortable public transportation.

I know that these barriers have caused me more than once to avoid social situations or the stop taking part in what used to be pleasurable pursuits for me.

For example, I have always had an abiding love for live theater. In fact, I belonged to and performed with a community theater group for years. I loved going every summer to the Shakespearean festival in Stratford Ontario, and going to the major shows that came to Toronto. I don't do that any more because I can't get seating that fits. There is a small summer stock theater near my old home town that will arrange a special chair for me if I phone ahead, but it's a hard wooden stacking chair and not particularly comfortable. But that's been my only live theater experience in a long time.

I love movies and used to go to the movies regularly, in my younger, smaller days. Then there was a drought of several years where I couldn't fit in the theater seats comfortably. I must praise AMC movie theaters for designing their new seating with the movable arms. I'm now back to going to the show with friends and I love it. AMC also has their online site where I can find out what's playing at my local cinema. I could even buy tickets.

Restaurants pose a continuing problem. My staff likes to do a lot of the social functions at restaurants. Our end of year one this year was at a restaurant that I hadn't been to in years and that had changed management. I stupidly did not phone ahead to check on seating but I did go early, so if there was a problem I could duck out and avoid a fuss by my colleagues. And of course there was not an armless chair in sight. The manager was very sweet however and he wouldn't let me leave until he'd had a thorough check behind the scenes. I ended up with a chair from the kitchen that the cook used when she needed to rest her feet.(Hey, maybe she's a BBW?) Sometimes all you need to do is ask nicely.

I know that often it's the fear of the unknown that holds me back. As I get older (and braver) I know that nothing is lost with a phone call and everything can be gained. Most places are very understanding, accommodating and discrete. They are businesses after all and want all the customers they can get. Often the ignorance about special needs of the Supersized can be addressed and the people running these businesses are more enlightened and aware after their experience dealing with a Supersized person.

Don't let fear hold you back. We all deserve to live life to the fullest.

************************************************************************

Manifesto: a public declaration of principles, intentions, purposes, etc.

A Fat Woman's Manifesto

(this big girl will NOT be pushed around any more!)

1. Diets will no longer factor at all in my life.

2. Life is a banquet. I intend to get my money's worth.

3. My weight is not open for discussionperiod!

4.I'll eat anything I damn well please!

5. I will not settle for second best.

6. I will greet the world with my head up.

7. Fear will no longer rule my actions.

8. I won't put up with put downs.

9. I won't base my self-esteem on other people's opinions.

10. I'm Fat. Get over it!

**********************************************************************

Romance writer, Pat Ballard, understands the BBW heart. She lives in Nashville, TN with her singer/songwriter husband of 28 years. She has one son who recently got married and is now expecting her first grandchild, a girl. Pat divides her workdays with writing and marketing her motivational romance novels with Big Beautiful Heroines, and marketing her husband's music. She has three books in print, and has just finished a fourth one. And, she says there are many, many more to come. What follows is my short interview with Pat. ~ Judy

1.Judy: What made you decide to write stories featuring plus size characters?

Pat: After living on starvation diets from the time I was eleven years old until I was thirty-five - anorexia, bulimia, I did it all - I decided that there was more to me than my body. It finally hit home that the real "me" was what was in my heart and soul, and my body was just the package that carried me. So I determined to eat healthily, exercise moderately, and learn to love the "me" that I became. During that time of freeing myself, and learning to love the real me, I realized that so many women, no matter what size they are, seem to be unhappy with themselves. So, one day, as they say, the light bulb went on over my head! I would write motivational romance novels with heroines that didn't fit the "norm." My heroines would be plus-size, full-figured, Big Beautiful Heroines.

2.Judy: Did you run into any difficulties finding a publisher who supported these kinds of stories?

Pat: I dealt with a few publishers enough to become "put out" with them for either trying to change my heroines or keeping my books on hold for too long. Then one day, I had the golden opportunity to meet and talk with a literary agent, and ask her if she thought that the mainstream publishers were still "afraid" to publish books with plus-size heroines. Afraid that they wouldn't sell enough to make the kind of money that these publishers like. She said that she did believe they were still afraid, and she didn't understand why. She advised me to "take your books to the Internet, and when they - the mainstream publishers - see your sales, they'll be fighting over you!" I had been considering this, so soon after talking with her, I discovered iUniverse and POD (Print On Demand) publishing, and haven't looked back. I finally realized the joy of holding my books in my hand and knowing that "I did it"!

3.Judy: What kind of public response have you had to your work?

Pat: To this point, I've only marketing via the Internet, but I think public response has been great. I have linked my website, http://www.patballard.com, with many, many other weight related websites, and this has created a very good "web-presence" for me, especially on Google.com. I have received some wonderful reviews, which can also be read on my website. I have good reviews on amazon.com and bn.com. I'm in the process of launching a marketing campaign to reach people who might not have access to a computer, to let them know that they can get my books from any bookstore. But the response has been fantastic. Everyone thinks this is such a great and much needed idea. And not just plus-size people. All sizes have really complimented me on this endeavor. My greatest joy, however, is when I receive an email from someone who is "thanking God for someone who is writing books like this." Or from someone who said she "broke down and cried," after reading my books. And all the other personal notes I've received from men and women thanking me for writing this kind of book.

4.Judy: Is it important to you as a writer and as a reader to have plus sized stories available? Why?

Pat: In my opinion, it is of utmost importance that we start making the public aware that plus-size women can be just as loving, sexy, alluring, and enchanting, as our smaller-sized sisters that we're constantly bombarded with via movies, TV, novels, and the general media. We simply must get the message out there that all women are beautiful, not just the young, slim, supermodel types. We have a lot of nonfiction books, now, that give us all the rational, psychological reasons that we're okay as plus-size people. Glen Gaesser's Big Fat Lies is a great example. It should be mandatory reading for every person in the world. But we don't have many entertainment type books, movies, or even sitcoms that portray the plus-size heroines as being someone to envy or fantasize about being like. We're reaching and satisfying some of the intellectual aspects of the situation, but we need to reach that part of our minds where we have fun. Where we have heroines that come on the big screen and just make men's mouths water, because they're so sexy. Where we have women, of all sizes, scrambling to read the next novel where the heroine is a big beautiful doll, taking on and conquering life in the fiction world, just like we do in the real world. I truly believe that until we establish this new type of role model - that women can be sexy at whatever size we are - we will never see an end to the destructive eating disorders that has so much of our world in its grip.

5.Judy: Do you have any advice for readers and aspiring writers of plus sized fiction?

Pat: Yes. Write it. The only wrong way to write is not to write at all. With all the options that the Internet offers us now, it's a wonderful time to be a writer. Don't be intimidated by the big mainstream publishers if they turn you down. Find an alternative method of getting your work out there. Just do it!

6.Judy:What work do you have available that would be of interest to our readers?

Pat: I have three books in print. Wanted: One Groom, Nobody's Perfect, and His Brother's Child. These can all be checked out at my website, http://www.patballard.com.

7.Judy: What can we expect from you in the near future?

Pat: I have just finished A Worthy Heir. It is at the copy editor's now, and should be in print by late August or early September. I have a compilation of short stories, Dangerous Curves, that will be in print soon. I have three more books started, and many, many more that want to be started!